HOWEVER. The woman at the very end of this video is named Elsa and here is a nice, long story about her and our meeting that I happen to like a lot.
When asking if she could sit by me, she touched my arm, which immediately endeared her to me. (Not a recommended method for males on public transit, btw. I mean, it will endear you to a cold glare and my pepper spray and that's about it.)
I pretended to keep reading (Anna Karenina for those of you curious) while trying to figure out this elderly lady safely from the corner of my eye: around 80 yrs old...clothes are simple but nails done...Clip-on earrings... aaaand she's pulling out a tube of Chanel. Okay now I'm smiling to myself.
She was so warm & friendly at every opportunity that I was reminded that I don't always need to be closed in on myself in public situations. I probably miss out on a lot of great conversations. (Also spare myself potential death. Also couldn't help but wonder how gullible she was, cause who is willingly that open and sweet on a bus to San Francisco with these...folks? For all she knows, I'll be the next one the driver is yelling at to calm down or she'll pull over and hit my eject button).
Well, one question snowballed into another and over the next 45 minutes I found out her story. Born in Peru, she was working for NASA when she graduated high school. Her boss told her she would make more $$ if she learned English and offered to connect her w/a job in Washington DC. "What do you do when you finish school?" She had a very strong Spanish accent. "You adventure. So I adventured."
She flew to Washington DC at 19 for her big girl job w/out knowing a word of English. When I asked how things went, she leaned in to my arm like she was sharing a secret and said "I got married within 2 years!" and laughed like she'd fallen for the worst trap of all adventuring girls. Her husband didn't speak a word of Spanish, either. "Spoke the language of love, eh?" I asked.
17 years ago he said he was done, that he didn't love her anymore, and he left her with nothing but the mortgage payments for a house he stripped clean, 2 daughters, and no job. Having never managed their checkbook, she got a job at Neiman Marcus and another as a secretary, and finished raising her girls alone. I showed her how to navigate photos on her iPhone so she could show off her 2
daughters, now working for GE in Sacramento and dancing with the New York Ballet, and 1 granddaughter, in ballet lessons of her own. She still has a huge family back in Peru that she has visited a couple of times, but they don't want to come here.
She showed me her SF hotel reservations her daughter had printed for her, and insisted I send her an email right there while she watched me, so she could have my contact to invite me to visit her "old, small but filled with love" house in Virginia. I thought she was just being friendly, until I realized she was seriously watching me, waiting for me to get out my phone to email her. Ha!
When a little old lady grabs your arm, looks you in the eye with a thick Spanish accent and says "You come. You come to see beautiful Virginia, and you stay with me" the way she said it, you will hear "come fill your soul with my wonderful Peruvian food and be my grandchild" and find yourself mentally scanning your calendar without knowing what's happening.
After the bus stopped, I asked if she knew where to go and she had no idea. While she waited for her luggage to unload, I felt a sense of responsibility for seeing her safely into a cab and went in search of the bus driver. By the time I'd given up and went back to make sure she hadn't been mugged, she was trekking away down the sidewalk, luggage in tow, smiling and waving back at me with her classy little head scarf on. She yelled that she knew where to go and that was the last I saw of her. Other passengers saw our exchange and when I looked at them like "well, guess I'm not as needed as it seemed" they laughed.
I reminded myself that in that 80 yr old body was a 19 yr old Peruvian girl who had uprooted her entire life for the sake of opportunity and adventure and never looked back. She had the house she had worked hard to pay for and repair along the way, and an incredible family now taking care of her that she raised herself in a foreign country.
Anyway, she emailed me back.. Twice. Once to tell me she had made it to her hotel and that her room was lovely, and the second time to tell me she was back in Virginia.
"Dear Ms. Sara, please let me know when you are ready to visit [name of town], VA, my dream house (small old house, but will always welcome you) and your family. I had a wonderful time. Saludos!"
This is me committing to make more friends like Elsa. <3
(My next post will be a photo of Elsa's kitchen table, an empty plate and my full heart, thank you very much and goodnight.)
